I have that personality type where when I go in, I go ALL in. There is no halfway for me. When I started playing golf, my “lets hit the ground running” attitude was tempered by speed bumps (aka: my caddy). While this is exactly the kind of thing I find horribly annoying, I have been trying to be more patient with life in general. What this all translates to, is that I did not spend $1m on golf gear the day before I’d even hit the range. And this… has served me well.
This whole new “patience is a virtue” leaf I’ve been trying to turn over is not easy to flip. The truth is, I’ve always been one for instant gratification and a “but daddy, I want it NOW” mentality. I did learn early in my forays down the fairways that this whole golf thing was going to take some time. Even though I have accepted that, it hasn’t always been an easy ride.
Last weekend I played 9 holes with my sister, bro-in law and a friend of ours. We played at the nine hole near their house because it was Sunday and I didn’t want to play 18 (it’s quite exhausting and I had to work on Monday and was trying to be “smart”). Anyway, this course is a great 9 holer because it has 2 par 4s, so you can still hit your woods.
I haven’t really had much opportunity to hit the range lately, but I have been trying to schedule at least 9 holes once a week. So I can’t really say I am rusty, but the obsession I used to have had to change a bit since I am no longer flexible in terms of schedule. Plus I still have some emotional dangling participles from the whole “nomorecaddy” situation. What this all boils down to, is that I am being extra nice to myself and not sweating how I am performing or how many times I’ve made it to the range. I am basically allowing myself to fall back in love under slightly different circumstances.
So there I was, playing 9, and I realized that I no longer put one ounce of pressure on myself. Nope. None. It’s like, well… I will hit Gertie, she will land, I will go find her and smack her again. At some point we will all end up on the green and I may or may not hit her “in”. And I just don’t really care.
OK, well I do care… but not in the way that I would be upset with myself for hitting a bad shot. Honestly I don’t have the emotional fortitude right now (when it comes to golf) and I just want to love it again.
And umm… I do. And I shot a 41(par 29, which leaves me a hair over bogie golf). And I am perfectly happy with that. But even if I’d shot a 61, I would have spent the day, in the sunshine, with my chums, having a lovely day. Since I don’t actually do it for a living, and am not going to get fired, it’s really ok for me to shoot whatever the heck I shoot that day. The number doesn’t matter. What’s important is that I am doing something I enjoy, with people I enjoy, and I am kind to myself. Why would I ruin a perfectly good Sunday being mean to myself?
…”slow and low, that is the tem-po” .
Showing posts with label women golf. Show all posts
Showing posts with label women golf. Show all posts
July 05, 2012
May 12, 2010
Feel the beat
Golf is all about consistency. The objective is to have a consistent swing, that makes solid connection with the ball which will hopefully land where we're aiming. Oh it sounds so easy! I have no problem hitting 5 shots in a row that sound great when the ball is struck, and then I watch in horror as my ball makes a right hand turn and lands in the parallel fairway. Sigh. It kills me. So if I can repeat that swing consistently, why I can't I repeat the swing that smashes the ball long and straight down my own fairway? It's quite a dilemma and has caused more than one unladylike word to fly out of my mouth. My swing mechanics are surprisingly good. It's the rhythm that I have trouble with.
When we address the ball and begin the back swing, there are a million little pieces that need to come together to produce a good shot. However, we can't think about all of those things because it jacks up our rhythm. It is difficult to relax and not try to hit the ball as hard as humanly possible, when we are supposed to let the club do the work. Maybe I'm too much of a control freak, I don't know, but I have a hard time letting go. There are days when the rhythm flows and days when it does not. I have finally realized that this is the same for everyone, so I've stopped beating myself up about it.
There is a rhythm in everything we do: daily life, work, driving, etc. Some days, it seems like everything is going right. We are productive at work, household chores are finished easily, and it isn't hard to find a smile on our face. As with our back swing, our daily lives are filled with little pieces that we are trying to get together. Situations arise that are beyond our control and we have to deal with it, but it impacts our rhythm. We get up in the morning with an expectation of what the day ahead will be. We have our to-do lists and intend upon getting things done. Nothing is more frustrating than when unexpected circumstances arise, which throw your entire plan for the day out the window. That can cause a good degree of stress and frustration. This is the time, to breathe for a moment, reassess, and deal. We are not in control of every situation that presents itself, and should perhaps stop trying so hard. Each bump in the road is just a bump. If we freak out about it we allow it to negatively impact our rhythm for the rest of the day, week, or even year.
It seems that if I have a round wherein my tee shots are a thing of beauty, I can't make a single putt. Other days, I can't get off the tee, but my short game is on fire. I have a choice: I can beat myself up about what isn't going well, or I can revel in what is. The same holds true with whatever is going on in my life. I can focus on whatever happened that has completely thrown my day for a loop, or I can choose to focus on how well I dealt with it. There are a lot of things I have no control over, but if I go with the flow, my rhythm will find its way back.
...and a 5,6,7,8...
When we address the ball and begin the back swing, there are a million little pieces that need to come together to produce a good shot. However, we can't think about all of those things because it jacks up our rhythm. It is difficult to relax and not try to hit the ball as hard as humanly possible, when we are supposed to let the club do the work. Maybe I'm too much of a control freak, I don't know, but I have a hard time letting go. There are days when the rhythm flows and days when it does not. I have finally realized that this is the same for everyone, so I've stopped beating myself up about it.
There is a rhythm in everything we do: daily life, work, driving, etc. Some days, it seems like everything is going right. We are productive at work, household chores are finished easily, and it isn't hard to find a smile on our face. As with our back swing, our daily lives are filled with little pieces that we are trying to get together. Situations arise that are beyond our control and we have to deal with it, but it impacts our rhythm. We get up in the morning with an expectation of what the day ahead will be. We have our to-do lists and intend upon getting things done. Nothing is more frustrating than when unexpected circumstances arise, which throw your entire plan for the day out the window. That can cause a good degree of stress and frustration. This is the time, to breathe for a moment, reassess, and deal. We are not in control of every situation that presents itself, and should perhaps stop trying so hard. Each bump in the road is just a bump. If we freak out about it we allow it to negatively impact our rhythm for the rest of the day, week, or even year.
It seems that if I have a round wherein my tee shots are a thing of beauty, I can't make a single putt. Other days, I can't get off the tee, but my short game is on fire. I have a choice: I can beat myself up about what isn't going well, or I can revel in what is. The same holds true with whatever is going on in my life. I can focus on whatever happened that has completely thrown my day for a loop, or I can choose to focus on how well I dealt with it. There are a lot of things I have no control over, but if I go with the flow, my rhythm will find its way back.
...and a 5,6,7,8...
May 11, 2010
Priorities
One of the best things about golf, is the social aspect. These days we are all so busy that it's hard to get together for drinks or dinner or whatever... The cool thing about golf, is that it's an excuse to make plans with people and what golfer doesn't have a time allotment budgeted into the weekly schedule?
Sixteen years ago, my twinster and brother in law moved about an hour away from me. To most people this probably isn't a big deal, but I was devastated. The thing is, even though an hour isn't that long of a drive (ok, it's an hour without traffic and there is pretty much always traffic covering that route)... but you can't be in each other's every day life. Meaning, we can't just pop by one another's house to borrow this or that, I can't drive my neices to or fro school or dance when my sis has scheduling issues, and we don't meet for coffee on Saturday mornings. This... makes me sad.
Whenever I get to pick what I want to do for the day (birthdays, etc.) well duh.. I pick golf! I don't have many golf chums, since neither my family nor my friends play. However, several months back, my twinster and I went to the driving range and hit a bucket of balls. She had never swung a club and with my incessant blathering about how fun it is, she wanted to give it a whirl. Although I am a fledgling, my guru has taught me well, and in terms of mechanics I am well versed in what you are supposed to do. Although each time I swing a club, it's anyone's guess as to whethere or not I actually pull all the elements together. The good news, I guess, is that I usually know exactly what I've done wrong and try to focus on a correction.
Since we are twins, my sis and I really "get" each other and speak the same language. I started her as my sweetie started me, with her 9-iron and a half swing. The only tricky thing is that although we are both left handed, I golf righty and she golfs lefty. We persevered and she was able to make some good ball contact and did well.
For Mother's Day I decided that my sis and brother in law should come down to my house early and that the four of us could play 9 before the rest of the fam arrived at my house for lunch. Since it was Mother's Day, we figured it was ok to do whatever we wanted. Once that was decided I set about the process of nudging (stalking, bullying) my brother in law to buy my sis a new set of clubs. It was a mildly painful process but we got it done!
Much to my neices chagrin, my sis and bro in law arrived at my house Sunday morning, ready to play. My sweetie's dad was still in town so we had a perfect 5-some. We got to the course and I was soooo excited! My sister was a little nervous but my bro in law was the one with the real jitters. Thankfully we got off the first tee without incident, and my sis played from the forward tees using her 9-iron and half swing. She wasn't going to get to the green in one, but this process helped her to get through the round without feeling frustrated and giving up. They both did well and now they have been officially bitten with the golf bug.
The thing about golf is... it is an excuse to get together with people. I was able to spend a lovely Sunday morning with my sister, sans kids. On the golf course, there is no room for serious conversation and the everyday stresses of life are forgotten. The golf course often feels to me, like a safe place to "get away". Spending time with the important people in your life, without the kids needing something, without the phone ringing or the television interrupting, is a forgotten concept. A round of golf is the grown up equivalent to "playing outside". When we were kids, that's all we did and all we wanted to do. As adults, we forget to unplug from the Matrix and enjoy the simple pleasures of life. When we play golf, we have the opportunity to forget about work, the bills, and the bathroom that needs to be cleaned. In this world of technology driven overstimulation, we have forgotten the importance of peacefulness. The golf course allows us to find it again, and gives us an excuse to nurture the little kid we all have buried inside...
Golf: it does a body good
Sixteen years ago, my twinster and brother in law moved about an hour away from me. To most people this probably isn't a big deal, but I was devastated. The thing is, even though an hour isn't that long of a drive (ok, it's an hour without traffic and there is pretty much always traffic covering that route)... but you can't be in each other's every day life. Meaning, we can't just pop by one another's house to borrow this or that, I can't drive my neices to or fro school or dance when my sis has scheduling issues, and we don't meet for coffee on Saturday mornings. This... makes me sad.
Whenever I get to pick what I want to do for the day (birthdays, etc.) well duh.. I pick golf! I don't have many golf chums, since neither my family nor my friends play. However, several months back, my twinster and I went to the driving range and hit a bucket of balls. She had never swung a club and with my incessant blathering about how fun it is, she wanted to give it a whirl. Although I am a fledgling, my guru has taught me well, and in terms of mechanics I am well versed in what you are supposed to do. Although each time I swing a club, it's anyone's guess as to whethere or not I actually pull all the elements together. The good news, I guess, is that I usually know exactly what I've done wrong and try to focus on a correction.
Since we are twins, my sis and I really "get" each other and speak the same language. I started her as my sweetie started me, with her 9-iron and a half swing. The only tricky thing is that although we are both left handed, I golf righty and she golfs lefty. We persevered and she was able to make some good ball contact and did well.
For Mother's Day I decided that my sis and brother in law should come down to my house early and that the four of us could play 9 before the rest of the fam arrived at my house for lunch. Since it was Mother's Day, we figured it was ok to do whatever we wanted. Once that was decided I set about the process of nudging (stalking, bullying) my brother in law to buy my sis a new set of clubs. It was a mildly painful process but we got it done!
Much to my neices chagrin, my sis and bro in law arrived at my house Sunday morning, ready to play. My sweetie's dad was still in town so we had a perfect 5-some. We got to the course and I was soooo excited! My sister was a little nervous but my bro in law was the one with the real jitters. Thankfully we got off the first tee without incident, and my sis played from the forward tees using her 9-iron and half swing. She wasn't going to get to the green in one, but this process helped her to get through the round without feeling frustrated and giving up. They both did well and now they have been officially bitten with the golf bug.
The thing about golf is... it is an excuse to get together with people. I was able to spend a lovely Sunday morning with my sister, sans kids. On the golf course, there is no room for serious conversation and the everyday stresses of life are forgotten. The golf course often feels to me, like a safe place to "get away". Spending time with the important people in your life, without the kids needing something, without the phone ringing or the television interrupting, is a forgotten concept. A round of golf is the grown up equivalent to "playing outside". When we were kids, that's all we did and all we wanted to do. As adults, we forget to unplug from the Matrix and enjoy the simple pleasures of life. When we play golf, we have the opportunity to forget about work, the bills, and the bathroom that needs to be cleaned. In this world of technology driven overstimulation, we have forgotten the importance of peacefulness. The golf course allows us to find it again, and gives us an excuse to nurture the little kid we all have buried inside...
Golf: it does a body good
May 07, 2010
Baby Steps
When I finally began the process of learning to play golf, I found myself being incredibly impatient. I guess I sort of thought that I would learn how to swing, hit a few buckets at the range, and hit the tee box. I didn't expect to be Paula Creamer or anything, but how long is it supposed to take before you can say "I am a golfer?!?!" So very frustrating... After a couple of months (yes months) of hitting balls I was finally ready to play a round. The driving range with a lovely little 9-hole par 3 course is about two minutes from my house (total score). At this point I hadn't really done anything besides hit my 9 iron, but that was perfectly fine to use for almost every shot. I played from the forward tee's which made the already short holes seem like munchkin land. This was actually good because although I was chomping at the bit to play, I was completely freaked out!
I made it through and thankfully we didn't keep score (but I did birdie the 9th hole, which was a total fluke). At that point I didn't have any real expectations in terms of skill, I just wanted to be part of the club. My sweetie and I have been playing that little course for about a year and a half now. I have definitely improved, but again... I am not exactly a threat to Paula Creamer. We had also added a couple of other courses to my repertoire, but I just felt like I was sort of a pretend golfer... and that totally bummed me out.
I started harping on the bf about playing "big girl golf" a year or so into it. Bless this man for his patience! There was definitely a "whine" factor involved. He decided that I could play a full 18 with par 4's and 5's as soon as I shot a 36 at this little course. Eh ehm... easier said than done (damned putter). I have come pretty close, but sadly, no cigar. To make matters worse, every single time we played I would feel this overwhelming pressure to shoot the damned 36. Honestly, this started taking some fun out of it for me, and ya know... nothing wreaks havoc on your confidence like hearing "you're not good enough". Of course no one said these words, but I felt like I was this remedial golfer and assumed that I was the only person on the planet who loved this game as much as I did, yet couldn't graduate to big girl golf. In my head all I could hear was "you suck". Sigh...
I think that perhaps this was a little bit evident because one Saturday morning, we were heading out to play. I assumed we were playing at our second most frequented 9 hole and sat back for the short ride. Well, after yelling at my bf because "you missed the exit! Now we have to go across the Golden Gate Bridge!" I realized that he had a little something up his sleeve. We drove north for more than an hour and finally reached our destination. The course is called Northwood and although it is 9 holes it does have par 4's and 5's. It also happens to be in the top 3, 9 hole courses in the country and after spending the day walking down the fairway surrounded by redwoods I could see why. Oh... and we played 2 rounds which means: Yahtzee! Big girl golf!!
Patience is a virtue I've yet to find within, but if anything is going to drag it out of me, it is definitely this little game we call golf.
I made it through and thankfully we didn't keep score (but I did birdie the 9th hole, which was a total fluke). At that point I didn't have any real expectations in terms of skill, I just wanted to be part of the club. My sweetie and I have been playing that little course for about a year and a half now. I have definitely improved, but again... I am not exactly a threat to Paula Creamer. We had also added a couple of other courses to my repertoire, but I just felt like I was sort of a pretend golfer... and that totally bummed me out.
I started harping on the bf about playing "big girl golf" a year or so into it. Bless this man for his patience! There was definitely a "whine" factor involved. He decided that I could play a full 18 with par 4's and 5's as soon as I shot a 36 at this little course. Eh ehm... easier said than done (damned putter). I have come pretty close, but sadly, no cigar. To make matters worse, every single time we played I would feel this overwhelming pressure to shoot the damned 36. Honestly, this started taking some fun out of it for me, and ya know... nothing wreaks havoc on your confidence like hearing "you're not good enough". Of course no one said these words, but I felt like I was this remedial golfer and assumed that I was the only person on the planet who loved this game as much as I did, yet couldn't graduate to big girl golf. In my head all I could hear was "you suck". Sigh...
I think that perhaps this was a little bit evident because one Saturday morning, we were heading out to play. I assumed we were playing at our second most frequented 9 hole and sat back for the short ride. Well, after yelling at my bf because "you missed the exit! Now we have to go across the Golden Gate Bridge!" I realized that he had a little something up his sleeve. We drove north for more than an hour and finally reached our destination. The course is called Northwood and although it is 9 holes it does have par 4's and 5's. It also happens to be in the top 3, 9 hole courses in the country and after spending the day walking down the fairway surrounded by redwoods I could see why. Oh... and we played 2 rounds which means: Yahtzee! Big girl golf!!
Patience is a virtue I've yet to find within, but if anything is going to drag it out of me, it is definitely this little game we call golf.
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